So I just tried dying my hair purple

AND NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED

WHAT DO I HAVE TO WEAR A FUCKING LAMPSHADE OVER MY HEAD JUST TO LET PEOPLE KNOW THAT "HEY I TRIED TO DYE MY FACKING HAIR AND I JUST FAILED MISERABLY"

I am just so sad right now.

My hair wouldn't accept the bleach. I wanted a purple ombre-ish hair so I bleached half of my hair for around 30 fucking minutes and nothing happened. Just... nothing. It's like I lit my fucking scalp on fire just for the heck of it. I even enlisted the help of my mother's friend which was so embarrassing for me because my hair wouldn't cooperate. I wanted to do another round of bleaching but of course I didn't want all of my hair to fall out so we proceeded with the dying, solely operating with pure hope. But hope isn't just enough. It's just... not enough.

What we only managed to do is suck the life out of my hair for Php 400. Pretty expensive just to destroy my hair.

It's just so facking sad.

Oh by the way, Merry Christmas.

On gender equality and me, yet again, being mistaken for a girl

Last week, I was riding the MRT to attend yet another night of merriment involving liquor, a thing which has become way too frequent this year for the liking of... well not me, probably my parents. Anyway, so I was inside the train standing, when one guy called my attention to offer his seat. To offer his fucking seat. Because he thought I was a woman. A fucking girl. A  g i r l.

Three things immediately ran inside my head:

1. "Aba'y punyeta ka." (This one never fails every time I get mistaken for a girl)

2. "Boys can grow shoulder length hair too. Punyeta ka."

3. "At kung sakaling babae talaga ako, sa tingin mo ba ganoon ako kahina para tumayo ng ilang minuto hanggang sa U.N. Avenue station? Ganoon ba kahina ang tingin mo sa mga babae na dapat lagi silang nakaupo para maging komportable? Mukha ba akong nahihirapan sa pagtayo? Mukha bang nanginginig ang mga binti ko dahil nakatayo nang ilang punyetang minuto? Punyeta ka."

I just looked at him sharply and gave him a smirk.

#genderequality

Uy bente na ako, like, 17 days ago

Dati, 'pag sinabing 20 years old na ang isang tao, dalawang adjectives kaagad ang pumapasok sa utak ko: "matanda" at "mature". Ngayong sumampa na rin ako sa 20, parang yung unang adjective na lang ang pwede kong magamit sa sarili ko. Bakit ganon? Akala ko magically magiging mature ka na lang kapag dalawang dekada ka nang nakatira sa mundo. Na sa loob ng isang taon na 19 years old ako, matututunan ko lahat ng mga bagay na may kinalaman sa maturity, para pag naging 20 na ako, maitataguyod na ako ng maturity ko sa mga susunod na taon.

Pero hindi pala. Kasi sinalubong ko yung birhtday ko ngayong taon na nagca-cram ng isang 10-page paper. Parang walang masyadong maturity dun.

Oh well. Pumasa naman na ako ng Chem 112 so wala pa akong dahilan para magdrama.